always functioning

Never break.
Always pretend to function.
Cannot show any weakness.
Cannot let them see it.
Bury all the pain deep inside.
Cannot be myself.
Led by the wishes and wants of others.
Conform to them until I no longer know who I am.
Cannot understand myself.
Cannot understand the world.
Cannot think anymore.
Cannot feel anymore.
I can only function.
I just have to function.
Have to. My whole life.
Every day. With everyone. At every place.
What happens when I cannot function anymore?
Do I have to switch myself off then?